She's Missing

Found this old poem i wrote about a year after I moved to Utah... needed something to post today but didn't have the time to type much. So when all else fails, copy + paste! Here goes...

She was independent and strong,
Real, and Inspiring.
She was Optimistic and Outspoken,
Free, and Open Minded.

She was here.
Now, she's gone
What did she do to make her surrender, then disappear?

Although shes's gone I can still feel her here... she's dying,
which brings me to tears.... I can't stop crying.
She's now a lost soul,
Like they used to say, when she was more vocal and set in her ways.

At times I feel her presence watching over me.
Hoping for me to escape, so that I can be free.
Free of this depression
Free of this obsession that I have with her,
So that I can be me, and she can be her.

She hurts to see me this way,
As she watches me desperately think of her day after day.
I had no prediction that I would feel such agony.
Wanting so bad to escape from this prison I built myself.
Full of sadness, desperation and hate.

I hear her tell me there's a solution,
That this is just part of my evolution.
That peace will come,
And one day I'll feel just at home.

Inspiring...
Exciting... are those words to my ears
But just like that,
I don't know who she is because we can no longer intertwine

Because....
Because she's missing.
I'm missing.....
Who is she? Who is she?
I'm not her, but she....
she was me.